Trillions of dollars in illicit financial flows slosh around our financial system today, facilitated by the most powerful centralized institutions. Current efforts to address IFFs are ineffective and result in harmful side effects for some of the most vulnerable in society. In this talk, we investigate the causes and impact of IFFs. Despite what certain bankers and politicians might have told you, the transparency and programmability of cryptocurrencies are a solution to, not a cause of, the problem.